Feminism in Fashion today: Classy Vs. Trashy

You know that awkward feeling you get when your at a wedding or some other type of social event and you see that women dressed really inappropriately? Her breast or her "assets" hanging out as you try and keep your mouth closed and your eyes on her face and try to look normal? Before you know it, there she is walking straight towards you with a warm salutation and friendly smile. You try and discuss the weather, the bride,  the flavoring on the potato salad, anything!!??  But your eyes keep bobbing towards the blinking arrows on her chest that are screaming, look here!  I have no idea how that women can be comfortable in her body, if I am not in her body ,and I feel that awkward for her. Sort of brings to mind the scene in the movie, The King's Speech when the future King George VI 

(Colin Firth) is ineptly babbling at the closing speech of the 1925 British Empire Exhibition at Wembley Stadium. Two words: Painful, awkward. 

 I remember years ago, I was going to Vegas and my husband wanted me to "go crazy" and wear something really trashy and I just couldn't. I almost had a mini melt down over it.  I belabored over finding that perfect revealing outfit for weeks and finally decided to meet him in the middle and wore a low cut v neck top with jeans. I was so uncomfortable. I hated it. I felt cheap and tacky and inauthentic.  FAR FROM SEXY.  Needless to say from that day forward, I wear what I want and what makes me happy. What makes me happy is dressing like I respect myself.  I certainly have had my share of bad might I say terrible fashion days however but that is another article. 

This topic of dressing classy versus trashy really interest me because I consider myself a feminist, but I also really love fashion.  No that is not an oxymoron. Yes I am a feminist,  I believe women should be treated with respect and valued for their contribution whatever that may be. I also don't believe that a woman's only contribution is determined by how she measures up on the Richter scale of sexual attractiveness. There is no Richter scale that determines sexual attractiveness btw.  You bring up feminism today and it seems like women look at you like a deer in headlights.  Feminism? What? Why do we avoid this topic and take it so lightly? How we dress is at the crux of the controversy of female objectification and power struggles so it's no surprise, but I really wish we would start a dialogue. Where is our moral compass on this issue outside of academia? I have my theories.

Andrew Sardone, a fashion blogger and your gay best friend du-jour says;

The look:
A tube dress and plastic platform heels.

The gay review:
Honey, I hope you kept your Stag Shop receipt ‘cause those stripper shoes and sausage casing gots to be re-turned. Geri Halliwell killed Ginger Spice so why you’d have to go and bring her back?!

The fashion tip translation:
You may think you’re bringing one of his Hustler model fantasies to life, but you’re probably setting yourself up for a hump and dump.

I’m quickly running out of attitude and muscle twitches so queeny Andrew’s final advice is: Some people like to say, “Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?” I prefer, “Why buy the horse if it looks like it’s already been ridden twice that day?” (Hands on hips, lips pursed.)

Moral of the story: Show off intelligence and a creative sense of style by customizing modern, basic pieces with unique accessories. Dress for yourself, you'll feel so much better you did and no one will stare at you awkwardly.

Personal Style; why no one's opinion should matter more than your own

The other day I posted some pictures on Facebook from a recent weekend excursion with my husband,  these pictures consisted of two dates and two outfits. One casual, one a little dressier.  I loved both ensembles, but I found it interesting how some people commented that I looked better in some outfits instead of others with no explanation as to why.  This annoyed the hell out of me. I mean yes thank you for the compliment, but what you are really complimenting on and responding to you is your own aesthetic, your own sense of comfort and fashion values. And I completely disagreed with their opinion. 

In my opinion all of my outfits had proper fit, were appropriate for the occasion, they covered me up completely, and I felt great in them. How can you judge someone else's style? I define style by; the colors, patterns, and shapes that an individual finds appealing. Maybe if the criticism was more specific like, " you know I don't think that color flatters you or I think that pattern you are wearing is not in proportion to your body", then your opinion would hold some merit and I would listen. But if you are simply commenting on my style, it's simply not necessary and we can agree to disagree. This is just a pet peeve in general of mine. If you are gonna have an opinion on anything please elaborate, state your case, and be specific. And if you do and we still disagree, it's not that I am stating that I am right and your wrong, I am simply stating my opinion is right for me and your opinion is right for you. Is that confusing? 

I have an eclectic sense of fashion and I rarely if ever like to play it safe.  It's not that I dress that over the top, I like wearing clothing that fits and flatters me like the next girl, but I always love to add something a little bit quirky, whimsical and eccentric.  It's what I love and what makes me happy.   My fashion sense continually  evolves,  as does my perception and understanding of what beauty is constantly redefined. I am not sure what it is, but I think there is power in deciding that your opinion is the only one that matters to you. Even if an entire fashion community disagrees with you.  It's not like I have this down to a science or anything, but I have noticed that those days I choose to " get creative" and break the rules and throw something together that pleases me and me alone- I walk a little taller, I laugh a little deeper and interestingly enough get hit on more and get more compliments. That is absolutely not my goal, but it does seem to be a natural byproduct of a healthy happy person. I think it has something to do with self esteem..... No who am I kidding? I know it has everything to do with this. 

I am not one for cliche's and I hate to be rebel for rebellions sake but sometimes I think you just  have to be true to yourself and not listen to all the opinions around you. I have had a funky life, I have been influenced by many different people from very different walks of life and I think my style reflects that.  What does your style reflect?  

Here are some pictures this week that I think capture the essence of what I am talking about. The first is the very beautiful Catherine,  Duchess of Cambridge and the second is an American artist that I love, Marion Peck.